how to start a conversation with a girl

How to Start a Conversation With A Girl You Like

Most guys never approach that sexy lady because they are too concerned about saying the right thing.


They are paralyzed by NOT KNOWING WHAT TO SAY.

There are tons all the beautiful women everywhere. I know you’ve seen that beautiful woman and you just wondered “How do I start the conversation in such a way that builds a connection and it leaves her wanting more?

Well let me break it down for you…

what to say to a girl you like

First rule is that it really doesn’t matter what you say. What matters is how you say it. I will give you a framework of what to say but you must understand that it may not work for you.

Two guys can say the exact same thing but get completely different responses based on their non-verbal communication.  So when starting a conversation have solid eye contact, don’t fidget nervously, and have a calm presence.

Now there are two categories of approaches, indirect and direct. An indirect approach is where you start the conversation without showing your sexual intent. A direct approach is where you start the conversation while openly showing your sexual intent either verbally or non-verbally.

I personally prefer direct approaches because she knows why I am there. I don’t have to finesse my way into a flirtatious conversation. I just jump right in.

Now lets cover different ways to start a conversation and break the ice.

Situational Conversation starter

Break the ice with her by commenting on the environment around you.  This is an indirect approach. Here’s an example of something you could say at the grocery store:

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(She is choosing apples in the produce area):  “If I were you, I’d go with Gala apples because they are delicious. Have you tried them before?

Can you see that it was nothing fancy or complicated? I made a statement and then brought her into the conversation. You can comment on anything you find interesting. Make sure you smile as you talk to her.

The main idea is to bring up something that YOU find interesting. If you try to think of something that she will find interesting, then you already lost.

This manner of opening will not always get a great response but also will rarely generate a negative response.

From here, ask her where she is from and have some small talk. Then, give her a genuine compliment and then start turning up the flirting.


Opinion Opener | Conversation Starter

Break the ice by asking for her opinion. This is also an indirect approach. Women love to share their opinion so this has the potential to work very well. For example, let’s say you are shopping for a new shirt.

If there happens to be an attractive woman around, ask her which one she prefers.

Flirt with her while she is helping you decide on a wardrobe. After you determine she is a girl you want to see again, ask her for her number. Say something like,

You know, I really like how easy you are talk to. I want to take you out for a drink sometime. What is your number?”

Notice how I said, “I really like how easy you are to talk to.” By saying this, I am making it apparent that we have a connection. And when she thinks there is some sort of connection, she will want to see me again.

Direct Compliment Conversation Starter

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Break the ice by going direct from the very beginning. This is my favorite way to start a conversation and pick her up.

Start off with a genuine compliment so that she knows why you are there. By doing this, she knows why you are there and it is much easier to get her number this way.

Here’s an example:

“Hey real quick, I know this is random but you are absolutely… ADORABLE”.

Or you can just use an implied compliment:

“Listen, I saw you here and I had to come over and meet you. Hi, I’m Matt”.

When you express your interest right away, you display confidence because you are willing to be vulnerable and risk getting rejected.

But the funny thing is that when you give her a genuine compliment, you will rarely be shut down.

After you compliment her, you want to find out if she meets your standards.  Find out if she is worth your time. Whatever you do, DON’T TRY TO IMPRESS HER. For all you guys that want to know how to get girls to like you, take note.

Because you don’t want to impress her. You want her to impress you. That is how you get a girl to like you.

Say something like, “So tell me something interesting about yourself.”

That’s what to say to a girl you like. This is a qualifying statement because I am trying to see if she meets my standards.

After she responds, relate to the topic by sharing a personal story or opinion about it. Then keep finding out if she is “cool enough” to hang out with you.

Remember, it doesn’t matter what you say but how you say it.

Here’s a video on how to start a conversation with a woman…

Want to trigger romantic chemistry within the first few minutes of meeting her? Grab this free training to seduce her in seconds.


Matt Artisan
Intl. Dating Coach & Founder @ The Attractive Man LLC
Matt Artisan is considered one of the World’s Top Dating & Attraction Coaches.

For the last 5 years Matt has personally conducted Live Trainings and Workshops in over 36 countries, helping thousands of men all of the world build confidence and succeed with women.

He has been interviewed by ABC and featured on MTV.
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