It’s not all about how to get a girls number. You’d have to know her logistics, too. How else can you go for “Day 2” and close the deal? You might never get to see her again.
Here’s the story:
“Who wants to come with me to switch IDs?” Fortunately, it was the most beautiful one in the group that said, “I will!”
The bar I was at last weekend in NYC had foosball where you had to exchange your ID for the ball. As we walk over to the bar for me to get my ID back and for her to swap hers, I whisper in her ear, “I’m glad you’re the one that came. You’re the one I wanted.” As her eyes lit up, I put my arms around her waist and guided her through the crowd (as a masculine man always leads).
While we waited at the bar, I took the opportunity to spike some attraction and getting her comfortable with my touch.
Fast forward 30 minutes later, after playing some foosball and grabbing a drink with her friends, I asked her if she had a chance to explore the restaurant upstairs. Why? Because I wanted to get her alone where I can escalate to the kiss and get to know her without the interruptions or distractions of her friends.
As we’re talking and getting to know each other, I feel it’s time to go in for a kiss. So I do. For the rest of the night, we couldn’t keep our hands off each other. Things are going perfectly! We’re spending all night together, going back and forth and the chemistry is electric.
After spending all night with a beautiful girl, I realized I made one of the biggest mistakes… I didn’t get her logistics. Waking up the next day, I thought for sure I’m going to make things happen with this girl. After some texting back and forth to set up a date, I found out she lives two hours away…
Instead of spending the night meeting girls who live near me, I spent the night with a girl I’m never going to see again.
Getting a girl to drive 5 minutes to meet up for coffee is easy. Trying to convince a girl to drive 2 hours for that same coffee is difficult; no matter how much she loves pumpkin spiced lattes from Starbucks.
In case you don’t know, one of the most important aspects of meeting women and dating isn’t just how to get a girls number but getting a girl’s logistics.
What are logistics?
Getting her logistics is when you ask the girl questions to figure out what her situation is. The purpose of this is to figure out the likelihood of steering the interaction where you want it to go.
For example, does she live 10 minutes away or 2 hours? That little bit of information would’ve told me, “Alright, I can set up a date for tomorrow, or I need to push to make things happen tonight.”
Whenever and wherever you meet a girl, you need to figure out the girl’s logistics.
For this email, I’ll focus on day time logistics. For those interested to learn more and how to apply it to the night time, here’s a previous blog I wrote: Night Time Logistics.
As I said before, logistics is figuring out what you need to know to set up an instant date, bring her home, set up a date later this week or any other result you want.
Say you see a beautiful girl on the streets and walk over to say hello. One of the most important bits of information you need to know is “How much time will you have with her?”
Let me ask if this ever happened to you. You approach a girl, things are going well, and then suddenly she says she has to go because she’s late to meet friends. Then you’re left fumbling at the last minute, trying to figure out how to get a girls number.
What mistake did you make in this situation? You never figured out how much time you have to work with.
I want to help you avoid this problem. Next time you go out approaching, I want you to answer the question, “How much time do I have?”
Here are some questions you can ask the girl to answer that question:
- What are you up to right now?
- Where are you headed?
- Are you free for a bit?
- What are your plans today?
- What are you doing after this?
- When are you free next?
Based on her answer, you know how to pace the interaction. If she says, she’s actually late for work you know to go for the number and set up a date. If she tells you she’s going shopping today, you may be able to spend a bit more time getting to know her.
These questions are to get you started, but I want you to be able to come up with these on your own. In the first couple minutes of the approach, I want you to think, “what relevant information do I need to know?”
For example, I live near NYC and meet a bunch of girls on the train. If you approached a girl on a train, what is a good logistical question to ask? The answer to the question should tell me, “how much time am I working with?”
If you said, “What’s your stop?” then congratulations! That’s the best relevant logistical question to ask in this scenario. Now you know if she gets off at the next stop, you need to speed things up. If she gets off to a much later stop then you know you have some time to cement the interaction.
Another example. Say you’re on vacation and meet a beautiful girl. What’s a good question to ask? The first one I like to ask is, “How long are you here for?” If she’s leaving soon then no matter how good my game is, it’s most likely she isn’t going to ditch her flight to go on a date with me.
Alright, I hope these two examples give you ideas for coming up with your own relevant logistical questions.
Now, say you approached a girl out on the streets, and things are going well. The mistake most guys make is to settle for the number.
Sorry to burst your bubble but a number is sometimes a stairway to heaven with nothing on the other end.
If you have the time, the goal of your day gaming approaches should always be an instant date.
You go from a random guy she met on the corner to a guy she’s getting to know over a coffee, a drink or bite to eat. This extra time to build comfort establishes you as someone she’ll want to see again.
If she has enough free time, which you determined from her logistics, ALWAYS go for the instant date.
To increase your odds of success, be aware of some nearby venues like coffee shops, cafes, bars, etc.
The good thing about Starbucks is it’s everywhere! Plus, most girls love Starbucks, so this is a great default to have in your back pocket if you can’t think of anything.
Your odds of a second date are always higher when going on an instant date compared to being a guy meets on the street for 2 minutes.
Once you figure out she has good logistics, say, “We should go to a [coffee shop, bar, etc.] nearby.”
If she gives you objections like, “No I can’t,” here are some things you can say:
- “I want to get to know you more.”
- “We will only go for 1 cup of coffee (or one drink).”
- “It’s nearby.”
The first line justifies why you want to bring her to get coffee. The last two lines lower the level of commitment. For example, it’s easier asking to borrow $1 than $100 because it’s a smaller commitment.
If she still says she can’t, that’s ok, because this makes going for the phone number easier.
Because she can’t get coffee with you now, saying, “Alright, let’s get that coffee next time, what’s your number?” is a smooth transition.
When you go for the number, be sure to ask her, “When are you free this week?” You want to set up the date then and there. It’s a lot easier to set up the date in person, than over the phone. Trying to set up the date over text is an uphill battle that you want to avoid when possible.
Your Weekend Mission (If you choose to accept)
Beginners: Make 3 approaches and be sure to use at least one logistical question in every approach. The interaction only counts if you remembered to ask a logistical question.
Advanced: Make 5 approaches and be sure to use at least one logistical question in every approach. In addition, try to bring 3 girls on an instant date. It doesn’t matter if she can or not. What matters is that you went for it.
Alright, guys, there’s the tip of the week!
Be sure to go out there and start implementing it RIGHT AWAY. Success loves the speed of implementation.
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